Exhaustion takes its toll

Yesterday I accidently threw away my current documents folder
containing over 1000 documents (created in the month of
February and not saved yet). I trashed it and emptied the trash.

Trying various methods to recover it but on Mac OS X it is
highly unlikely. All my art work (designs for our upcoming
screening for posters and ads and postcards and etc) GONE.

Last night I just stared at the computer screen wanting to cry
but just being too overwhelmed and tired. But then I obcessively
tried until 3AM to recover something. And again this morning.

I lost... just can't grasp all that is gone.
It overwhelms my brain.
The hardest thing I will have to deal with are my lost graphics.
ALL my current psd docs are gone. These are photoshop files
with the layers so you can change and replace text etc. CRAP.
And of course I have a deadline to submit an ad for the
Genesis Awards Journal.

I just need to push onward. I know each time I need to find
or work on a document from graphic to written I will look for it
then know I will have to recreate it. Okay, that sucks.

People ask me, why has this film taken so long to complete
since I do not have funding (from a production company etc)
I do most of this myself. My website looked like crap until
December when I decided to redo it, and found templates
and through trial and a lot of ERROR messages I redid it.

My flyers and postcards I designed and produced the artwork.
Press Releases I write myself (although I send it to a couple of
friends for imput, feedback and rewriting), the website,
letters asking...begging for funding, thank you cards, which I have
two I need to write and really feel today I need to get them out
because on days like this I think of Oprah and her gratitude
journaling etc. (I LOVE Oprah, so don't diss me on that one).
When crappy things happen I really feel that you need to look
for things to be grateful for. And two people donated money
and I am WAY overdue on their letters.

Okay, I am late for my temp job, which fyi I was told yesterday
is going to end sometime next week. So bad things happen in...
threes... waiting for the third shoe to drop. No wait it already did
I noticed in one of our ads they listed someone elses website.
Ours is
http://www.freetoagoodhomemovie.com
theirs is
www.freetoagoodhome.com

I have sent two emails already begging for them to put a link
on their site. But they go unanswered.

SO the deleting thing was number three. I better go write
those letters.

I am also VERY grateful that we have SOLD twenty tickets
to the screenings already. That is GREAT!